Before I begin I'd like to apologize if I cuss or say stupid things. If you read this, thank you for taking the time to do so, but if you'd rather not, then please don't bother yourself.

I'm just so tired of the way things have been going. I'm tired of people who claim they are my friends throwing me under the bus when they don't have a use for me any more. I do my best to be a good friend. I try not to bring too much attention to myself when I'm upset. But..I'm tired of having to be strong. I'm tired of just sucking it up and faking a smile when around my family or friends. It's so lonely and it hurts.

I just dunno...I'm lonely...life isn't going well...I'm stuck in a routine...but I can't get out and do anything different. Even the day trips I take with my parents are almost always exactly the same.

I just dunno what to do anymore. I can't go to a friend's house...being homeschooled isn't as wonderful as it's made out to be...it's lonely as fuck...I know I have to accept the fact that..life isn't going the way I want it to, and that it'll be a long time before I can get out and meet my friends outside of the internet...but that doesn't mean I have to like it...

I'm sorry...I know I'm being immature right now...I just...I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of being used. I'm tired of acting strong. Tired of being alone.

I love you guys. I hope none of this is offending to you. I just...wish I could see you in real life you know...? I'm sorry, I've just been holding this in for a long time...I dunno where to go...or how to get rid of this stress and frustration..

Thanks for reading, sorry to bother you.